Blah Day

Do you ever just have blah days? I'm having a blah day and I don't know why. I hate when I can't figure out what is bothering me. I also that I can't just accept an off day now and then without questioning whether or not my meds are working still and getting scared that I'm backpedaling in regards to my ppd recovery.

I guess part of my blah day is that another member of my HR team resigned yesterday. I love this girl uber much and hate to see her go. She is the sweetest person - always willing to help, always (almost) has a smile on her face and is so funny. I actually hired her a couple months after I started here so she has always been synonomous with our company to me. I honestly cannot imagine this place without her. It scares me. And with her leaving, it makes me wonder what I'm missing - should I be looking for a job too? What would I do? Where would I go? I hate hate hate starting a new job - I hate the pressure of being the "new girl." I hate not knowing anything and having to ask a million questions. I hate that people don't know who you are and therefore have no idea whether or not you're a "get it done" person or a "sit on your butt and be lazy" person. It's exhausting. Plus, you have no friends so you eat lunch alone everyday. I spent enough time being the "new girl" growing up because my parents moved so often. I guess I just don't want to do it anymore.

I'm blah because of the weather. I'm ready for warmth. This off and on crap is really getting old.

I'm blah because of the house - it's never clean! There is always something to do - paperwork to sort, bills to pay, sweeping to be done, laundry, groceries, etc. Grrrrrrrr. I can't wait until Owen is big enough to do chores. He was washing my cabinets the other day with a tissue - that was kinda cute. Maybe he's ready to help out? Wait.....hold up.....did that tissue have a booger in it? Oh great!!!!! Now I gotta clean the cabinets. Crap.

So anyway - just having a blah day. What do you do on a blah day to cheer yourself up?

Love,
E